- Every time you tell a child to sit down and wait, and then ignore them, we are damaging that child.
- Every time we promise a child something we know we cannot give them we are damaging that child.
- Every time we favour our own wants over those of a child, we are damaging that child.
- Every time we favour someone else’s child over our own, we are damaging that child.
- Every time we leave our child with someone else when we go to something interesting, that they would have been capable of doing, viewing, seeing, too, we are damaging that child.
- There are other ways, but I expect you have understood what I am saying here – our children deserve every good experience we can give them, so they can grow and learn to be good and resilient people. Because no parent is perfect, no matter how hard they try, but working through their imperfect upbringing is one of the tools our children can and will use, to become that resilient we want them to be, for their own good, for all of us who will ever come into contact with that child, all through their life.
Because you know what, it’s true – Those damaged children can still learn, and grow, and become fine people, if they can get the love and attention they need, sometimes, from someone. If you are a parent, and you want your child to be the best they can be, for themselves, and yes, and for you, their parent too, do them a favour, do society a favour, and pay attention to your child, as much and as often as you can.
Children learn things in a vast number of different ways. They learn by seeing, hearing, smelling, feeling, tasting, but also but less obvious ways, and they are sensing things and learning things, every single day. They copy, they try things out, they practice, they experiment – if they see you doing something, you’d do best to make sure it’s something you’ll feel OK if they do the same thing, because they will do it.
Can you blame them? Parents and other relevant adults in a child’s life are those they will learn from, as well of course as television and other forms of media, and from their friends, and everyone else they see. If you want your child to read books, make sure they see you reading books, read to them, give them books, take them to libraries! If you want them to eat good food, do the same yourself, and have good and nutritious food available for them.
Take your child for walks, visit museums and art galleries, try out things with your child – horse riding, kite flying, gardening, mountain climbing, watching sport, taking part in sport, everything and anything, if you do it with your child, they will learn as you both learn, strengthening themselves as you strengthen your relationship with your child.